Weigh-In Wednesday – Getting It Done and Moving Forward

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Began 5.30.15
Start weight: 305
Goal weight: 175

Last week: 273.8
This week: 276.4
Difference: +2.6 lbs.

Total loss: -28.6 lbs.
Amount to goal: 101.4 lbs.

Overview: I totally deserved this gain. I didn’t log all of my food. I was voraciously hungry after being sick for a week. I didn’t go completely crazy, but I didn’t do what I should have done. I have been barely holding on to the lifeline of Weight Watchers for the past bit, but I really feel like I have found my focus again. I spent a good deal of time on Pinterest yesterday, looking at new recipes and before and after pictures. I know it sounds funny, but I feel like the switch has flipped up again and I’m ON. I am ready to take on the world again.

And to prove it, I wore a dress to work today that I haven’t been able to wear in YEARS. I wanted to remind myself of how far I’ve come and what a good job I’ve done.

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Do you see that?? My boobs stick out further than my stomach! That’s something to celebrate! And the sweater I’m wearing was one I didn’t wear often because the sleeves were so tight on my arms and it really just didn’t fit right. And now it’s perfect! I could even button it if I wanted to!

So…while I’ve slipped a little, it’s nothing compared to the leaps ahead I’ve made from where I used to be. Every day that I don’t give up is a victory. Every day that I make some sort of forward movement is something to cheer about.

Also, I just got an email listing four 5-week exercise classes being offered for free! Each class is once a week for an hour, which I think is perfect for someone just starting out. I’ve decided to pick two. Here are my options:

  • TurboKick
  • Yoga
  • Insanity – which doesn’t sound as bad as I thought it would. It’s all about going at your own pace while pushing yourself.
  • Vinyasa Flow

I’m so excited!

Weigh-In Wednesday – Facing the Truth

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Fact: I haven’t posted a weigh-in since two weeks ago, but I DID weigh in.

Fact: It hasn’t been pretty for the past two weeks.

Fact: Having written out those goals the other day REALLY helped.

Fact: I am so greatly and outrageously and immensely looking forward to a random mid-week day off tomorrow!

I’m going to get the stupid weigh-in over with. Because next week, it won’t matter.

Began 5.30.15
Start weight: 305
Goal weight: 175

Two weeks ago: 271.4
This week: 275.4
Difference: +4 lbs.
Total loss: -29.6 lbs.
Amount to goal: 100.4 lbs.

So basically, my whole last month was a wash. I lost 2 pounds, lost two pounds, gained two pounds and gained two pounds. That’s frustrating.

But I really REALLY need to understand that I did not get into this position overnight, and it’s not going to get fixed overnight. I did not learn these bad habits, and my anxiety disorder didn’t manifest overnight. My stress levels didn’t just go from zero to 5 million overnight.

In fact, I’m 40 years old, and I think the last time I was even remotely near a normal weight was when I was a freshman in high school. I weighed 180 pounds. It was about that time my mother put me on the Weight Watchers plan the first time. I don’t remember why it didn’t work. I do remember going to the meetings and feeling so amazing. I remember being approached by the team leader and learning that they would love me to be a team leader when I reached my goal weight. I do not remember this time of my life lasting very long. I cannot recall counting a single point. I don’t know why I stopped the plan, or why it didn’t work for me. I can imagine that what happened was that I started feeling good about myself, and my mother likely didn’t like that idea. There was probably some money emergency that came up that kept me from going. The excuses could have been anything. I wish I knew why I stopped going.

The next time I used Weight Watchers was on my own in 2000. I had a website somewhere that listed the points values for things, and I kept track of it all myself. I wound up getting down to 260 pounds by 2003. Then I met my now-husband and gained weight again. Then I got back on Weight Watchers in 2009 and I was losing quite a bit of weight. That was also the year my mother and I stopped speaking, and by the time I got pregnant with my daughter in 2010, I was back off the plan and the weight crept back up.

I would call myself a yo-yo dieter, but I never really get down low enough in weight to be the low yo part. I just go down a bit and then right back up.

The cycle is now broken. I refuse to give up.

Every day that I stay on plan is another day closer to when I will be at a healthy weight. I WILL know what that feels like. It WILL happen.

God, I want it to happen.

So…moving forward. That’s what I do.

Today’s lunch was rather simple because I had the “nothing fried” rule to follow. So I wound up eating a huge salad and some fresh fruit. It was 7 points for the meal.

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I didn’t intend to only consume 7 points worth of food. There really wasn’t anything else to eat down there. What you see: lettuce, ranch, radishes, pepperoncini, red peppers and chicken. It was delicious, but I wound up having to eat a Clif bar this afternoon because I was rearranging clothes on the sales floor and started getting light headed.

I plan to have a yummy dinner, and tomorrow I intend to take myself out for breakfast.

It’s about time to head home and make some food. I hope your Wednesday is going well.

Weigh-In Wednesday – The “I’m Not Dead” Edition!

Let me start this post by saying that I’m sorry for having abandoned my blog for the past two weeks. Right before my last post, I lost my refill of my anti-anxiety medication, and I wound up going one week without it before it FINALLY was found. I will sum up the past two weeks as just saying that it wasn’t good. It was really not good. I stopped my 30 day challenges. I slowly fell apart until I was able to get back on my medication and piece myself back together.

I am happy to say that in that time, I did not waiver from my Weight Watchers plan. I kind of held on to it like a lifeline.

I feel a lot better now. And I will be back to blogging regularly. I really don’t know how else to express what I was going through.

I must also give many thanks to my sister, K, and my best friend, T, who never stopped checking in with me and gently (T) or not so gently (K) pushing me to return to my blog. In fact, when I got home yesterday, there was a package waiting for me – my sister sent me an aerobic step! I hear there may be more things coming. I can’t wait!

So…without further adieu…my weigh-in:

wednesday

Began 5.30.15
Start weight: 305
Goal weight: 175

Two weeks ago: 279
This week: 271.4
Difference: -7.6 lbs.
Total loss: -33.6 lbs.
Amount to goal: 96.4 lbs.

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I EARNED ANOTHER BEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will update more about the things that have happened in the past two weeks in another post. I want to keep that one very positive, so I’m not going to attach it to this one. It’s going to be all about motivation and where we get it and if it matters.

Talk to you soon!

Weigh-In Wednesday

wednesday

Began 5.30.15
Start weight: 305
Goal weight: 175

Last week: 281.6
This week: 279
Difference: +1 lbs.
Total loss: -26 lbs.
Amount to goal: 104 lbs.

So…I gained a pound this week. And I’ve decided to listen to my Weight Watchers app:

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I seem to have hit a bit of a plateau. I keep losing and gaining the same two pounds. I have been faithful to my challenges and I’ve stayed on plan. Actually, there were two days this past week that I ate too few points for the day…I’ve been trying my hardest to keep on top of my water. I hate it when women use this as an excuse, but my monthly womanly friend showed up the day before yesterday, so it could be linked to that.

Either way, I’m researching plateaus and how to bust through them. I’m tired of waiting for my next bead!

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Weigh-In Wednesday

wednesday

Began 5.30.15
Start weight: 305
Goal weight: 175

Last week: 281.6
This week: 278
Difference: -3.6 lbs.
Total loss: -27 lbs.
Amount to goal: 103 lbs.

I’m so proud of myself this week! I stayed on plan the whole week, even with a date night thrown in, and I drank all of my water the majority of the days. I started my 30 day workout challenges yesterday and I turned down mac & cheese.

I am SO MOTIVATED to lose 3-4 pounds in the next week so I can both get my next weight-loss bead AND so I can be under 100 pounds to my goal.

I plan to post again tonight after I complete day two of my challenges, so I’ll write more then. Right now, I’m just GIDDY!

Weigh-In Wednesday – Let’s Regroup, Shall We?

I wanted to skip today. I wanted to just stay in bed and avoid the scale and the world and hide under my blanket until Thursday morning, because Wednesday is weigh-in day, and I knew it wasn’t going to be pretty.

Here’s the thing. I have an anxiety disorder. I know that people throw that phrase around a lot these days, but I actually have one. I get debilitating anxiety attacks that turn my arms into icicles and my legs into rigid sticks. I get overwhelmed by the strangest things, and I have a really hard time voicing when I struggle with my anxiety. I tend to keep it down deep inside until something sends me over the edge, and then I have an anxiety meltdown.

Continue reading “Weigh-In Wednesday – Let’s Regroup, Shall We?”

Wednesday Weigh-In – Milestone Reached!

25poundsBegan 5.30.15
Start weight: 305
Goal weight: 175
Last week: 281.8
This week: 279.8
Difference: -2 lbs.
Total loss: -25.2 lbs.
Amount to goal: 104.8 lbs.

Now that was a sweet way to start the day! Actually, it was a very frustrating start to my day. My scale decided that today was the day it was going to hate me. Every time I stepped on it, it gave me a different number. I picked it up and cleaned the feet. I swept the floor under it. I made sure it was in the same exact spot in which it always sits. I was about to ell-my-ess (nice way of saying, “lose my shit”) when it FINALLY started giving me the same weight more than once! Woot!

And then, my Weight Watchers app gave me the great news that I’m now down 25 pounds! Double woot!

That made me wonder just how much 25 pounds looks like. So here you go.

Continue reading “Wednesday Weigh-In – Milestone Reached!”